PDA Student — Quick Help Sheet

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The big picture

PDA students do best when they feel safe, respected, and offered choices.
When they feel pressured, corrected publicly, or controlled, they can escalate fast, even if they want to cooperate.
Please don't process complaints or "behavior reports" within the student's hearing. Save it for private adult-to-adult communication.

What HELPS (do more of this)

Tone + body

Calm voice, fewer words, neutral face/body.

Low-pressure language

"I wonder if…" / "Want to try…"
"We can do A or B." (both acceptable)
"I'll start—join when you're ready."

Make it doable

Start with a tiny first step ("Just the first one.")

Tools early (proactive is best)

Chewy / crunchy snack
Soft/comfort option
Water
Short quiet break
Fewer eyes / reduced audience

What BACKFIRES (avoid if possible)

Pressure loops: repeating directions, rapid prompts, countdowns
Power struggles: getting firmer, "because I said so," trying to "win"
Public/shaming moments: calling out, correcting in front of others
Narrating behavior within earshot: "He's doing X again…"
Long talks when upset: lectures/debates (won't land in the moment)

"Safe people" + quick check-in

"You're here. You're safe."
"A or B to help your body?" (quiet / water / chewy / 3–5 min break / read)
"When you're ready, first tiny step."

Go-to supports: / (backup: )

Safety (least escalatory)

Make space first (move other student / move group / switch seats).
"I'm making sure everyone has space."
Lower demands (fewer words).
Offer 2 options (quiet corner/support room; water/chewy).
"When ready, first tiny step."

No physical force unless immediate danger + trained staff + school policy.

Early signs

Refusal that escalates
Unkind words/cursing
Tears
Sharp defensiveness, "STOP/go away!"
Shutdown/escape (read/hide)
Door shutting/slamming
Bolting/leaving room

After (when calm)

"That was hard. Glad you're safe."
"Next time—space, chewy, or support room?"
Keep it short; teach later.

Team tip: A tiny, neutral note after a hard moment helps everyone. What happened right before → what we tried → what helped. That's how we reduce repeats over time.